"God gives special kids to special people" and why that's a load of BS

Katie and her son
Katie Corkern knows what it means to be in the trenches of parenthood. She and her husband have a medically-fragile son.

Like every parent of a special needs kid (including yours truly), Katie has been told, "God gives special children to special people." Now, people are well-meaning, of course, but Katie is calling them out:

In all these years I’ve heard from family, friends and strangers about what a great job I’m doing raising my Connor man. I look down, shift my feet around and quietly say thank you. Then the dreaded words are said. “God only gives special kids to special people.” I kindly smile on the outside, but on the inside I scream. I hate that saying. I know these sweet people only have the most genuine thoughts behind this, but they need to know the truth — God can give anyone, yes, anyone, a child with special needs....

We’ve all heard that saying: “God will never give you more than you can handle.” I call that BS. My God is a loving God but a challenging one. He wants to see me thrive and grow into the person I was meant to be. Challenges along the way are all a part of the journey He has created for me; how I deal with them is up to me. God will give me more than I can handle, but He guides me and gives me the grace to encounter them.

She's right. There is nothing special about us. We don't naturally have more patience or kindness. We aren't born with the medical knowledge it takes to raise our kids. We are befuddled and angry and at a loss of what to do many, many times.

When you’re given a child with needs that are far greater than you can imagine, you must rise to the challenge and become the parent the child needs and whose life depends on it. It will be a tough, long road full of potholes and dangerous curves trying to throw you off course.

You can read Katie's entire piece at The Mighty.

(Might I add that The Mighty is a great website - uplifting and honest.)

1 comment:

  1. Thank you for this post. We are currently in therapy sessions with our 11 year old granddaughter that we are raising. She is a very volatile child. I keep asking God why and so far there is a lot of silence. But I know He will give us the stamina needed to keep on going,

    Zoanne Brugger Clark

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