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Families And the Ties That Bind

A number of years ago, I interviewed for a job. When I was hired, the guy who would be my boss told me: "We will treat you just like family." I hesitated. I mean, no matter how a great a family is, there are some bumps in the road. If you're from an Irish family, being treated like family can mean anything from getting terrific gifts for your birthday to getting un-invited from a reunion because you forgot your 2nd cousin's anniversary.

In our family, we've had a couple of small weddings in the past few years. Typically, our family weddings are all-out bashes, sending out invitations to everyone from Mom's great aunt Clodagh to your cousin, his wife and their 10 kids.

Smaller weddings are certainly understandable. It's expensive. A lot of our family members are footing the bill themselves, rather than relying on Mom and Dad. And, honestly, some of our family members don't know each other too well. If you're trying to be frugal, the guest list has to stop somewhere.

In a perfect world, all of this would be understood. But this ain't no perfect world. Feelings get hurt. people feel left out and drama ensues.

Here we are, a few days after one of our small family weddings, and not only are feelings getting hurt, but salt is being rubbed into wounds. It's ugly.

This is the sort of "ugly" than can tear people apart. I'm saddened but I'm trying to be Switzerland (not a place I'm terribly comfortable.) What should be a wonderful event is tainted by hurt feelings that others won't acknowledge. We'd all hug it out, and things would be fine. Yeah....

Seems like the Golden Rule is applicable here. Sometimes, we just have to keep quiet (and if you're Irish, you know this is darn near impossible.) The balm of Gilead should be applied generously. Maybe by the time the next wedding rolls around, all will be forgiven.

I doubt it, but hope springs eternal.

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